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How To Recognize That Trauma Is Leading Your Life?

By J. Chatfield

Trauma, most of us do not realize how great this cataclysmic force is until we understand that it is needed in order to evolve as humans. If you don't believe in the evolution of the soul then look at it as a passageway to living a drama-free life. Oh, it is possible, but first, let us look at why it is important to deal and heal from trauma. Trauma is a needed push that reveals to you the reason behind the reason you are experiencing what you are experiencing. Let's look at an example: If you ask someone why they love dogs. They may answer something like this.

" When I was a kid my brother would steal the covers from me. I was the youngest and I always got the last of everything. In the winter it was so cold when the blanket was taken. My dog, Ben would snuggle up close to me so that I could benefit from his body heat. This went on until my mom found out and had my grandmother knit a blanket just for Ben and me."

Some would look at this as a great story and say "Awwwww" with googly eyes and a tilted head to the side. I hear this and say " Maaaaaan" you suffered chronic trauma in your life. My next question would be " How are you dealing with it"?

Emotional Responses

Have you ever had a conversation with someone and they became so swollen in the chest with emotions that they made you emotional.? You weren't emotional before you met them but, now you are walking away feeling like you just saw the movie The Notebook for the first time. This is because that person still gives valuable energy to a past trauma that they haven't dealt with.

Trauma becomes a comfortable bed that allows you to lie in it whenever a situation comes around that you can link it to. It becomes an excuse, a reason that never gets you the results you want. And that is to be free from it. That person doesn't even know they can be free from it because it has become a part of the building blocks that make them who they are. Ask yourself: Do you like holding on to something that doesn't produce the results of peace and freedom?


We all know at least one person whose life is the same as it was two, three, four years ago. They may have the same job or different jobs, but they always have the same type of everything. You can't tell if they have been on the elevator or not because they have not walked any closer to the door than the last time you saw the door open. Why is this? The trauma has a hold of them and they don't have a hold on progressing their life.

Whatever the past trauma is, it wants the person to deal and heal from it so it will not go away because nothing has happened in the way of resolution. Trauma is kind of intimidating until you tackle it head-on and see that though it may be hard to face. The results from facing it are priceless. There is no greater feeling than seeing the door open to a new level in life when you have dealt with and healed from past trauma.

If a person is unable to turn the lens on themselves and go back into that moment and heal. They will forever face Gandalf from The Lord Of The Ring and hear life say
" You Shall Not Pass"!

Negative Attraction

This one I have mixed feelings about calling negative. I have dealt with some past trauma that wasn't bringing negativity but I had assigned the negative hashtag to it. As stated above, Trauma wants you to deal and heal from it as much as you don't want to go back and face those emotions. So, you will be hit again and again with "Toxic" situations until you realize that this thing may need to be addressed.

One of the most common attractions you will see is in relationships. You leave one relationship and jump into another and see that the next relationship is the last relationship times 2. You leave that next relationship and go into another relationship and it seems like that relationship is the baby of the last two relationships. It becomes harder and harder to recover, but somehow you think all future relationships will be better.

One more example is having toxic people around you as your friends. It won't seem toxic at first, but along the way, those friends become more and more unrelatable and you begin to see the relationship for what it truly is. Whatever that thing is, you need to find out where the root grew from and set it on fire.

So what is being said is...

The reality is that Trauma is a thing that needs to be embraced. It is essential to your existence and everyone has some type of trauma to deal and heal from. Some have deep-rooted trauma and others don't. It all depends on your mission while on earth. If you see any of these signs in your life, take some time to visit those emotions and find help to release the pain out of your life so that you won't be stuck in a life you do not deserve. You don't want to live in the past over and over. Nor do you want it to come back and "haunt" you right when you are on an upswing in your life. It will stay as long as you allow it to stay, so don't let it live in your present and future.

J. Chatfield is an author, homeschool parent, and podcaster that loves to uplift heal, and motivate others to live their purposed life. She loves writing stories/producing media for children and adults to assist them in knowing themselves. You can find her books: Homeschooling and Owning Your Schedule, The Facts Of The Numbers Are: Understanding How Your Children Learn Using Numerology and other various story downloads on her website;

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