Feeling like a victim self-perpetuates victim-mindedness.
Yes something wrong did happen to you or your family. You have a reason to feel bad. You then mentally replay the trauma in your mind long after the event ended. You are emotionally on the hook. You were wronged. No question about this. You experienced trauma. Justice demands retribution. You are resentful until payback is made in full. Perhaps the story you continually replay in your head about the past wrongs elongate the effects of the past events in your present life. So you continue to surrender your future attention to the past and with each waste of your present attention on the past trauma, you miss creative opportunities to get up, and create the future you would like to live in.
Like I said, you were the victim. To your detriment, another benefitted and took advantage of you or someone in your family.
Wait: is our victim-mindedness beneficial?
Feeling like a victim will not make it more likely that others will stop mistreating you, abusing you, or admit to you their wrongs.
Feeling like a victim doesn’t get you the elevation or priority in life you desire, no matter how much the wrong should be righted. Feeling like a victim doesn’t make what did happen to you go away, It happened already! Feeling like a victim empowers the wrong-doer, not you. Your mind and emotion have been crippled and entrapped by the past wrong. Come to the present.
So yes, you were a victim. You were done wrong. We all were at some point in the past (or maybe some point in the future we will be).
But feeling like a victim, after the wrong has been done, only fuels your victim-mindedness and keeps you perpetually stuck in a victim-mentality. And it is the victim-mentality, more than the past wrongs that others did to you, that blocks you from the future victories you would like to see happen in your life.
About the Blogger: ShonSpeaks is the managing member of The Fleming-Bruce Law Firm, P.L.L.C. and has a blog at www.freeyourthinkingmind.com . ShonSpeaks is also a certified and licensed brain health professional.
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